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Fetch My Slippers, BigFoot! (or 'Pffffft')

Scene 1

This totally sweet Leper dude is sitting on a rock in the desert or on a park bench and hes doing something really cool, but Im not certain what. The music in the background is peaceful and relaxing like the music from Grease! The Leper is looking totally tubular even though he needs a bit of gel for his hair and his sandals are sweet too. The audience gets all scared because suddenly BigFoot pops out of the sand or from behind a billboard! The Leper does this sweet double backflip with two and a half twists and lands perfectly (to which the Disciples later gave him a 9.8). BigFoot is all like 'Grrrrrr' and stuff. The Leper grins and shuts his eyes. BigFoot advances and it appears like our hero is done for but at the last second BigFoot stops in his tracks! The Leper used his mind control power on him! YEAH! Suddenly this ninja pops out of a suitcase and is all scary looking but the Leper just says "Pffffft" and BigFoot fully BONKS the ninja lights OUT!

Scene 2

Its obviously a different day because the Leper looks even sweeter than in the last scene. He is walking through a marketplace or doing a 10K. And wouldnt you know, BigFoot is wearing a sweet robe and carrying the Lepers packages. The Leper mind control rules! He turns to BigFoot and calls him 'Weezie'. The Leper then looks at the camera and wails on his lute! ROCKIN'! Fade to black as the credits roll and the Leper is being fully bodacious and/or hard-core!


I wrote this script while at a live taping of 'The View'. I got so pumped I put Starr Jones in the Figure-4 leg lock! She walked like Yitsak for a week!